“How to Set Boundaries Without Being an Asshole”
This lecture will discuss setting internal and external boundaries in CNM relationships. We will start with how to establish boundaries early in a relationship, then talk about circumstances where you need to change a bad boundary, or establish a new one due to changing circumstances. We will talk about particular circumstances that commonly affect CNM relationships like setting (and holding) boundaries in NRE, establishing (or reestablishing boundaries) when there’s been a breach of trust, and managing boundaries with metamours. Interactive questions from attendees are welcome and encouraged.
Bio: Jason Best (he/him) is a therapist who specializes in working with LGBTQIA+, Poly, and Kink populations on a variety of issues. I’m self identified as Poly and Kinky, and I’ve been in non-monogamous relationships for about 10+ years. For 10 years, I was a senior therapist at Alexian Brothers, and ran multiple psycho ed groups per week where I presented on a number of mental health topics (including boundaries.) Since Alexian, I’ve done of a number of presentations for therapist trainings on how to work with kinky and poly populations, and I’ve also worked on a series of lectures through Upswing Advocates on mental health topics for queer and trans folks, including boundaries. My last speaking engagement was at the University of Chicago in late Febuary of this year, for a sexuality class for therapists where I covered how to work with kink and poly patients.